24 December 2011

Who is SHE (Part II) ???


I remember the 20-something dating scene. It was all fun and games with a LOT of icing on the cake until I reached my late 20s. It was then where every lady after several dates initiated the leading, open-ended questions regarding relationships on a serious level. The first time it happened, I nearly dropped my drink. Here I am, leaning on the bar at the loudest club in the world with rumps shaking and bumps bouncing and she leans over and says, "How long do you expect this thing to last?"

My obvious answer, "Well, they usually shut this spot down around 4am."

She gave me the "Negro-please" look. I gave her the "deter this conversation by all means" responses and I made it out of the club alive. It mattered none. She continued later where it ended after a "Good morning" and a kiss upside my hungover head.

This was my inauguration into what numbers may mean in the lady's scheme of things. Sure, exceptions follow closely behind the rule; and, every lady clearly will not stack under every shady category. For the sake of my story, I'll speak on what I see and believe (my interpretation of the situation).

Before I plunged into the scene I read an article from my favorite magazine. It detailed dating from an interesting perspective and was quite credible. The piece examined dating from the angle by men between the ages of 36 to 45. These men enjoy the pick of the litter, the writer acknowledged. He is alluring enough to romp with ladies in the 25-year-old range because they are inquisitive and curiously interested, which would provide the guy with a few dates and a little more until the well runs dry. He is mature and wise with enough energy to manage himself in the presence of ladies in their late 40s and older. She has all she needs and what she wants is generally what he can provide along with the proper acumen to get lost when time calls for him to do so. Also, there's the ladies in his age range which would be the most difficult. They want more than when they were 25, yet are less able to comprehend where they fit in the long line which life assigns; making them, in a sense, less comparable to their older counterparts.

I laughed, marveling on how this theory was right on the money. To further substantiate those proposed findings, I eventually dated a lady in each group.

Wait until I tell you who SHE is ...

23 December 2011

Love Letter

[POETRY (#1)]

I fear you some days:
Only because the Frost-y way says nothing
Gold can stay. Yet, your reality rushes me,
To be greater that any forty-niner believes.
Sweetest sugar, the way you soften my senses
Lowers my walls, obstacles and fences I
Pledged to hedge my security and face my
Fallacies. The same place where my emotion
Redeems, tricked my threes to conceive
This as an abnormality. Yes, the formality;
While blessed in totality; I just want to
Conceive the probability that possibly your
Beauty just may be for my eye only.
What can be more clever than forever.
Whether we weather every weather reveals
More than we can understand today.
Can I hold your hand while we play?
Any less is more than I can say.  -  February 2011

22 December 2011

Who is SHE [Part I] ???


Thirty-something dating has been the most enigmatic activity I have participated in to this date. Thankfully, one of my best friends -- he is single, dating and 52 -- tells me it gets worse later. We ponder and laugh often while comparing ladies who we most recently befriended failing to determine why they do the same from 25 to 50 years of age and even beyond that. The "same" includes that which we would consider detrimental to any positive or progressive situation.

Please do not misunderstand where I stand.

Many of us struggle breaking bad habits, yet there (over there) flies the GIANT RED FLAG suspended under the umbrella representative of your essence; and, absolutely nothing has changed. Yes, variables may erupt from circumstances leading to dents and divots in one's resume, but what draws the "She did, that, bruh?" response reveals character much more than external features.

The fact it gets worse makes sense and the theory that it does should deter anyone from living that life. Who is 50-something and single? That demographic automatically raises questions and if anyone in their 30s believe it is unserviceable shopping these days; I am sure in this instance later will not be greater. I shudder at the idea of being 50-and-single. It is impossible to imagine and difficult to conceive that could be me, too.

[My friend divorced a few years ago.]

In the mind of a man, women are generally perplexing. It is understood. Every entity of woman is not meant to be comprehended. Man must move on when reaching that door: don't knock, don't pass GO, don't collect $200; find your way in the opposite direction and bust a move. Consequently, should confusion shock my senses when what she speaks and how she acts reads like foreign language?

What I do? I laugh. (lol)

I entered the dating scene after a divorce and waited for the registration information for the refresher course to show up in my mailbox. It did not, so, I spent a little while knocking the dust off my "dating rule book" from my 20-something days. Born from this came a few things I decided must be adhered to at all times: (1) be transparent, (2) leave the "Playa Card" in retirement and (3) always make sex last on the list. The last two are amendments to my younger days [thank God for progress].

The plan was set: ready ... GO!!!